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dreams can come true
CategoriesELEGANT TRAVEL, MANIFESTING INNER PEACE, MANIFESTING LOVE & PLEASURE, THE MAKING OF A SPIRITUAL WOMAN

The Making of a Spiritual Woman: Video #21 (**Dreams CAN Come True**)

Chère Diary…

Oh my goodness, day by day I am feeling more and more for Guy.

Two nights ago Sandra, Guy and I went to a movie, “The Chacal”.  Then Guy drove me back to my car at his house and we just couldn’t say good-bye!

We ended up going up to his place and spent a beautiful 2 1/2 hours together.

The way he looks at me is just the way I always dreamed a man would look at me.  He truly cares about ME, more than anyone ever has.  It’s a spiritual love and such a deep, deep caring.

The next night Sandra and I went over to Guy’s house for dinner.

What an AMAZING cook he is!  As he cooked we snuck kisses and touches.  At one point he whispered in my ear,

“Yier soir était trop court” (Last night was too short)

I giggled and then felt my eyes roll back in my head remembering it all!

Tomorrow he’s taking me to a man made lake. Ahhhhh…I don’t even have words for how I feel right now.

Chère Diary…

Today was magical.

I arrived at Guy’s house and as soon as we saw each other we hugged and kissed and then ended up making love for 2 ½ hours!

We then decided to go to walk in the forest.

Guy and I both adore spending time in nature, and today he suggested he take me to his favourite forest.  One that is his favourite spot to meditate.

Ahhhh….inner peace and bliss doesn’t even begin to describe what I was experiencing as I walked through the forest and meditated with him.

meditation in france

He has a very strong Buddhist practise that he does and I love balancing my chakras and just being still.

The silence, the birds, the quiet, the peace….this is ME.

There is absolutely nothing more  special in this world than being your true self and really living it.  

Erin, I am so proud of you.  You followed your dream!

You gave yourself permission to come here to France, even amongst all your doubts and insecurities.  I love you!

After we finished meditating we felt hungry, so we went to buy some fresh lettuce for dinner and a little treat at la Patisserie.

Guy and I both felt so enamoured by how perfect the day was so we couldn’t keep our hands off each other!

As soon as we arrived at his house we had another 2 hour session!

Have I mentioned that I actually experience the big “O” with Guy?  Yes!!!! Never in my life did I think I would get to understand what that was.  I never experienced it with anyone, but with Guy, I have!!!

What are you doing to me, Guy?

Who ARE you???

Now we were totally hungry, so Guy cooked the spaghetti I had bought and I made my famous sauce.

Frank Sinatra was playing in the background, and as we moved around the kitchen we hugged, kissed and cooked…just like the dreams I used to have.

He wasn’t acting and I wasn’t acting.  This was real.  This was natural.

And let me tell you, when Guy set the table and lit candles for us to eat by candlelight, I almost broke down crying. Everything I had ever wanted and asked David for was being done for me, without me even asking. Thank you, God!

We had great conversation and then before dessert, Guy came over to me, took my napkin off my lap and pulled me up to dance.

Okay……..can he fulfill any MORE of my dreams???

After dinner we talked, listened to more music and once again made love.

The way he looks into my eyes and touches me is so different than anyone else.  It’s a spiritual, healing experience and the emotions are going wild yet at a calm pace – this is just so amazing.

So, why do I still feel so unsure of Guy?  

Join me tomorrow HERE when I do a complete 180 and make a decision that might make you go, “Erin, NO!” (Trust me, if I were the person reading the post I may do the same, but…)

Have YOU ever felt totally confused about something?  A job?  A business? A partner? A relationship? A move?  I’d love to hear about it and how you moved through it!

ekurt
self love
CategoriesELEGANT TRAVEL, MANIFESTING INNER PEACE, MANIFESTING LOVE & PLEASURE, THE MAKING OF A SPIRITUAL WOMAN

The Making of a Spiritual Woman: Video #20 (Self-Love)

Chere Diary,

Today Guy, Sandra and I got together at night, but I didn’t want to act like a couple with Guy.

I stared at other guys and thought, ‘Guy’s not my type.  I’m not attracted to him like I should be.  I have to stop things. I have to tell Guy that I can’t handle all of this.’

When we were alone together though, I began feeling attracted to him!  I wanted to be intimate with him!  He makes me feel so cared for and my soul craves to be loved by someone other than myself.

However, I got up the strength to talk to him about how I was feeling.

Being the type of guy he is, he told me he’d understand if I needed to slow things down or stop things. And, that if I ever needed to talk about David or my feelings that he was here to listen.  

I told Guy that I feel like this year I need to be alone, yet at the same time I feel great when we’re together.

I also mentioned that I feel like we should end things now before any stronger feelings develop and that he doesn’t deserve to be with someone who can change their mind from day to day.

He listened, held my hand, and then leaned in to kiss me.

God his kisses make me melt! What am I going to do???

On a side note, I’ve begun sketching and painting!  So far, all of them have been naked women in nature. I’m loving this theme and how it’s just coming out of me. So interesting!

It actually seems very appropriate because I’m feeling so comfortable, not only with my soul, but in my skin, my figure, my eyes, my mouth and my sexuality.

For the first time in my life I truly feel emotionally, spiritually and physically connected. Self-Love!

If I think back to this time last year, it is exactly the time that I first left David.

Now look at me!

I’m in France, truly discovering Erin, the “woman”! A VERY powerful, sensual experience.

I’m LOVING it!

Every time I am out grocery shopping or stopping at the Post Office I get whistles, comments and compliments.  I think it’s because I am projecting the beauty I feel inside right now.

I am so comfortable in my own skin!…Even with the extra weight and horrendous acne I have right now!

Anyway, I’m seeing Guy tomorrow so we’ll see how things go.

Join me tomorrow HERE for  pure moments of BLISS & CONTENTMENT…and then utter confusion!

If you are seeking self love, ease of living, connection to your soul, as well as how to elegantly manifest your dreams, I invite you to commit to being a Spiritual Woman and learn more about The Art of Living Elegantly

.the art of living elegantly

ekurt
soulmate
CategoriesELEGANT TRAVEL, MANIFESTING LOVE & PLEASURE, THE MAKING OF A SPIRITUAL WOMAN

The Making of a Spiritual Woman: Video #19 (Soulmate?)

I spent the rest of the day playing with the kids, eating with the family and trying to figure out how I really felt and what my soul really wanted.

Sandra said she knew all along that Guy liked me.  It was obvious she said.

My big worry was that I didn’t want anything to ruin our friendship and the synergy between all three of us.

Sandra was extremely supportive as she thought Guy and I had a lot in common.  So, I decided to go to Guy’s house that night.

Before I went, I sat down with my diary to try and work through what my soul wanted.

Chère Diary,

Okay, a lot has happened and I really need to sort through things.

Today Guy and I went shopping at an organic store – man he is always so damn thoughtful!  He knew I had been missing my soya products and specialty flours, so he surprised me and took me there.

After, we went for a LONG walk since the weather was so gorgeous.  It felt incredible to be with him. It was easy and I felt so comfortable to just be ME.

There was an ease, a peace.

All I kept thinking was, “THIS is how I always want to feel in a relationship. I want to be fully accepted. To fully be able to talk about spirituality, life, organic healthy food and…”

I’m scared. So scared.  But…I also feel excited.  My insides are flipping!

Could this be the LOVE that my horoscope told me about?

Could Guy Be My Soulmate?

Okay, here is the kind of man I desire:

  1. Honest
  2. Giving
  3. Completely devoted to me and my happiness
  4. Spiritual like me
  5. Dark, Thick hair
  6. Well toned body – likes to keep in shape
  7. Cooks
  8. Loves life
  9. Good sense of humour
  10. Great lover
  11. Someone who I feel is “IT”, no doubts
  12. Loves art and music like me, or even more than me
  13. Plays an instrument or sings
  14. Enjoys nature

How does Guy size up to this list?

Man! He aligns with almost every one except #5 and #11, and I’m not sure about #10 yet;)

Well, I’m going to go and hear what Guy is feeling and thinking.  Should be interesting!

Chère Diary,

Okay, Guy and I drank chai tea and talked about everything we had in common. Guy also admitted that from the very first day we met, he felt I was “IT”, “The One”.

We laughed, talked and shared how we felt and then listened to music. Suddenly, Guy took my hand.  The electricity was HUGE!

We both looked at our hands then looked up at each other’s eyes… and kissed.

The electricity between us was intense….different than between Matt and I.

We were both feeling SO much emotion!

God, I felt womanly!

Suddenly, Guy stopped kissing me and without even saying a word, asked if I wanted to make love.

I was 100% in. This experience was different than anything I’d ever experienced before.

I don’t know why but the emotion I felt, the intimacy between us, was on a different level. It was spiritual.

He was saying all kinds of things in French:

Pince-moi, c’est vrai ca? he said. (Pinch me, is this real?)

Tu me conduis fou! ( You drive me crazy!)

And then… Je t’aime, Erin. (Uh-Oh… you know what THAT means!)

This scared me a bit. But, why did it feel so amazing to hear a man say that to me again?  And to know that he really, REALLY meant it?

I needed to go so Guy walked me to my car.  He told me he felt like he was in a dream, and I have to admit, I did too.

Wow! Did I just experience this? A romance in France? With a beautiful soul?

My God..how my life has changed, opened up, and totally become what I’ve always dreamed about.

Join me HERE where I share the continuation of this story…and it’s not what you’d expect.

Much, much love,

Erin Kurt

ekurt
je t'aime
CategoriesELEGANT TRAVEL, MANIFESTING LOVE & PLEASURE, THE MAKING OF A SPIRITUAL WOMAN

The Making of a Spiritual Woman: Video #18 (Je t’aime?)

“Erin, I knew it was you” Guy said.

I stood there in shock, not really knowing what to say.

The next thing to come out of my mouth was, “Ah bon?”   (“Oh yeah?”)

(Oh my God Erin, what was THAT?)

Guy started speaking so fast saying,

“When you stretched out your arms for me, it was my sign that you felt as I do. I asked the Universe to give me a sign and this was it! I knew it from the beginning, Erin.”

(It was a sign? I was just being my Canadian huggy self!)

Racing through my head, all in a millisecond, was:

When I think of us together I feel very happy, but at the same time I’m scared. I’ve only been in France for 3 months and I want to explore life by myself. If I dance with someone I can and I like that. I don’t want to be tied down.

Argh! Sometimes I think I’m ready for a relationship and other times I think, “NON!!!, NON!!! pas mainteant (not now). Nothing serious!

Out of my mouth came,

“Guy, je ne sais pas. Je t’aime mais je ne sais pas si j’ai l’amour pour toi comme tu as pour moi.”
(I don’t know, Guy. I like you, but I don’t know if I have love for you like you do for me.”

“Tu m’aime? Je le savais!” (You love me?  I knew it!)

Huh? Je t’aime?

Here’s where the tricky part comes in with the French language.

They simply do not have the phrase, “I like you.” ‘I like you’ and ‘I love you’ are the same.

I kept trying to explain what I meant by I LIKE you, but I don’t know if I LOVE you.

I tried saying, “I mean I Love you. You are an incredible person, but I don’t know if I LOVE you.”

Can you see the problem? He was so confused but so blissful at the same time!

He told me to come to his house later so we could talk more.

He gave me a huge hug and then left while walking backwards, staring me square in the eyes with such an intense look on his face.

Oh. My. God. What just happened???

Do I go to his house tonight? What if he gets too intense? Oh, I don’t want to lose our friendship!

Time for a call to Sandra to sort this out.

Join me HERE to see if I go and what happens next – big hint!!! France is the country of l’amour:)

P.S. What do you think I do? Should do? Have you ever experienced this situation? What did YOU do? Let’s chat in the comments below!

Love,

Erin Kurt

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french love affair
CategoriesELEGANT TRAVEL, MANIFESTING LOVE & PLEASURE, THE MAKING OF A SPIRITUAL WOMAN

The Making of a Spiritual Woman: Video #17 (French Love Affair?)

Chère Diary,

Well, I did it! I survived a Christmas alone, in France! We had a really nice day – lots of eating, laughs and calls from home.

I am feeling so much JOY right now and it’s really helping me speak more fluidly!

I am noticing that whenever I feel joy throughout my body I feel more courageous to speak with people, to ask for the car and to experience life here fully. Interesting.

There was actually a concert of Celine Dion on TV tonight and I loved it!!!

She is a role model to me.

Celine shows that a woman can be wealthy, happy, in love beyonds words and live life with joy…and it’s OK. This is what I want.

christmas in francechristmas in france
_________________________
It is the afternoon of le 31 decembre and I am feeling very reflective.

I remember the feeling of utter depression and hopelessness at this time last year. David and I had hosted a New Years Eve party and although we had fun with friends, when the clock struck midnight, my heart dropped.

I only ever had 1 New Years Eve romantic kiss from him…when I was 17 years old. He told me he loved me, but since then, nothing.

Every New Years Eve I would hope, but was always left feeling so alone and disappointed.

Where was the passion between a husband and a wife? Where you thanked God for bringing the two of you together and you BOTH felt love and deep, deep feelings for one another? Was I just stupid for thinking this could ever exist?

Well, I have begun to realize NO.

Being here in France I have learned so much about myself and how I want to love and be loved.

Sandra came from no where and I love her.

au pair in france

Guy came from no where and I love him. He has shown me, by example, how to be comfortable in one’s own skin and how to have compassion for others, on a whole new level.

I have been spending every last second with Sandra and Guy and each day we laugh so hard that my stomach hurts and I almost pee my pants!

All three of us are looking for the exact same kind of love and won’t settle again for anything less.

We all LOVE music, laughing, art, spirituality and FOOD!

I feel like the luckiest person. Yet, I have some sadness inside because I miss being in love. I have so much love built up inside of me right now and I just want to to hug and kiss Guy to let it out.

But, I’m so scared of losing my independence or becoming so lost in love that I don’t continue to follow my dreams.

I keep telling myself, “Live for TODAY, Erin!” but my insides resist this.

I tend to always live for the future and I KNOW this is wrong.

It negates the happiness right now. I will definitely work on this.

Here’s to a new year and an even better life.

What will happen in 1998? I won’t even try to guess!

Chère Diary,

Oh man, I have GOT to get my weight under control! I have fallen off the wagon again from emotional eating and gained even MORE weight! I tried on my black dress and could barely do it up!

I started laughing instead of crying, which is interesting for me.

“Could it have shrunk accidentally?” I wondered. So I tried on my black pants and could barely do them up too.

No, it’s definitely me and my butt!

Less fat, more activity. I will walk more and get to sleep at a good hour so I have more energy to work out.

It’s my birthday soon and I really want to feel good on the day.
______________________________
Chère Diary,

It’s my birthday!!!

Sandra and Guy planned an an incredbile dinner party for me. I am SO LUCKY to have them in my life!

I have two best friends… here…in France…and we only speak French!!! Am I dreaming?????

Is this actually my life???

For my present, they both chipped in and gave me a new bottle of my signature perfume “Beautiful”.

We talked, laughed and drank a lot of champagne, and at one point we got into a tickling fight on the sofa.

Actually, Guy was really focusing on me.

I am sensing that he feels something for me. And, if I’m completely honest, I feel an attraction for him too, but would never, ever want to do something to ruin our friendship. It is far too special to do that.

I think it’s just the fact that we have so much in common and he’s not had friends like us either, so he is loving the feeling of JOY when he’s with us.

The strange thing is that he always seems to know what I need at the time I’m thinking I need it!

How bizarre is this??

For example, yesterday, I thought, “I wonder if Guy will remember that I like flowers and that I really feel like eating a fruit pie.

He brought BOTH to the party!

And two days before that, I was telling Jean-Do and Maelle that I really would like to find a bottle of Maple Syrup so I could make Canadian pancakes for them.

Who shows up later that day with a “little something for me”? Guy!!! With a bottle of maple syrup!!! Does he have me bugged???

We finished my birthday by watching a movie called, “Forget Paris”. We all loved it.

What an incredible and memorable 26th birthday.

Gosh, every weekend we go to different forests and beaches to walk around and explore We always end up doing yoga or meditation in the forest, which is peaceful beyond words. And, just the other day, we had a traditional French picnic with cold quiche and salad, and later played frisbee.

I feel like I am living the real Erin, down to the atomic level.

I know that sounds weird, but it’s the only way I know how to explain what I feel right now. I am 100% me, even on the spiritual level.

Chère Diary,
I woke up today and realized that I had forgotten to take the movie from Guy’s house. It was due back at the video store today, so I called Guy. He told me he’d come pick me up so we could take it back together.

I was a bit nervous to be with him alone. I felt a bit shy without Sandra being there. He and I had never been alone together and…

Whenever we give each other the 4 bisous (4 kisses) on the cheek there is an electricity that goes between us. I don’t know what to make of this.

I love Guy’s spirituality, his views on life, his humour, his kindness, how he cooks, his beautiful eyes, his love of music (especially when he plays that one song on the pan flutes!), but there is something not quite ALL there.

pan flutes

After we dropped off the movie, Guy surprised me by taking me to a health food store! He knew how much I had been craving certain health foods.

As we walked around the store I could feel the energetic tension between us.

Whenever we talk and look into each other’s eyes there’s the weirdest thing that happens! I literally FEEL a buzz of hot energy between us!

Anway, Guy drove me back home and helped me carry my bags into the garage.

I put down my bags,  turned around to say a huge thank you for taking me to the organic store, reached out my arms to do the “Canadian thing” and give him a big hug and…

BOOM! He pulled me towards him, laid the most passionate kiss on me and said,

“Erin, je savais que c’etait toi.”

Join me HERE when I translate this and share what transpired after my unintentional expression of love!!!!

Have YOU ever experienced this kind of electricity with someone?  What did you share in common?  What were the qualities that attracted you to him/her? I’d LOVE to hear all about it in the comments!

With so much love,

Erin Kurt

ekurt