So, here’s one of the TOP questions I get asked: “How do I find my Life Purpose?”
Women all over the world are feeling the inner urge for fulfillment. Life as usual just isn’t cutting it anymore.
They want to feel like they are having an
impact. Doing something they love. Experiencing a sense of fulfillment that
simply doesn’t come from working for someone or being a mother or wife.
Not that those things are bad or boring or don’t bring a certain sense of fulfillment but women are desiring MORE.
I could do a masterclass on this topic actually, which I am sensing will very soon (Let me know if this would interest you by leaving me a comment below, okay?)
But, the video I filmed this week came to me to share first. It’s the first understanding and perspective that is necessary. PLUS I lead you through a guided meditation.
So, if you are one of the many women who is
desiring more from life, this video is for you. Please share it with any woman
you know who may benefit from hearing the message, okay?
How can I count the number of gifts it bestowed upon me? One of the grandest being self-love.
When you do a google search on self-love you will find videos, blogs, quotes, and podcasts speaking about WHY we need self-love, but what I have always found missing was the HOW.
HOW do we love ourselves?
I’ll never forget a memory: me in my early twenties, refusing to spontaneously go dancing with my group of friends.
Now, I LOVE dancing! It wasn’t that I didn’t want to dance, I DID! What stopped me in my tracks was that I didn’t feel confident enough in myself, have enough self-love & self-acceptance, to walk in there and just dance my heart out…while wearing jeans and a T-Shirt.
Instead, I got very upset with my friends who were “pressuring” me to go. I turned it on THEM and was so hurt that they were not being understanding.
(See how we spin things to suit our
ego/limiting beliefs?)
The next day I went over to my much older
friend’s house and shared my woes, hoping she would agree with my allegations.
She didn’t.
We got into a very looooooong discussion and then I asked her, “How do you know what your style is? You always seem so self-confident.”
Her answer? “I don’t know. I just do.”
Not very helpful, right?
This really sent me on a self-love pilgrimage. In 1997-1998 I found myself in France; a country where self-love comes easier. Not for everyone, but there is something ingrained in the women that served me SO well…and I want to share it with you in today’s video.
Looking for some fabulous Valentine’s Day ideas? Well, as you know already, we do things a bit differently here at The Elegant Life:)
As Elegant women, we always check in with ourselves first.
And when we do this, we have a knowingness of what our soul desires and how it would like to ENJOY Valentines Day.
Now, I’ve always had a dilemma because j’adore themed holidays! I think it’s the teacher in me:) So, to go out for dinner and be served everything in heart shapes would thrill me to no end…the problem is, my husband doesn’t feel the same way.
He resists holidays like Valentine’s Day because he dislikes the commercialism of it. He prefers to be loving and generous to me all year round (okay, and to not have to pay triple the amount for a meal and flowers).
This used to really hurt me. And the hurt often turned to resentment….“You know I love it, so why can’t you just do it for me?”
However, as you realised fromlast week’s post on How to Elegantly Set Boundaries, we as Elegant women must know what we require and then decide what we will do if the other person does not give us what we need.
WE are responsible for our own happiness.
So, here’s what I decided to do, since he wouldn’t budge:
a) I became clear on what I actually LOVE about Valentines Day. You know me by now:) Yes, I love the fact that it’s all about LOVE.
b) I also love how you can easily have a themed evening around it.
c) I also love showing people how much I love them.
d) I love sharing the excitement of a holiday with my kids – they’re exactly like me:) YEAH!
So, for the past 5 years I have been creating a themed Valentines Day dinner, at home with my family, that I love so much. Yep, heart shaped lights, heart shaped pizzas, heart shaped cakes and decorations, and a LOVE HUNT where my kiddies follow clues that are all based around ways we love each other.
And while I do this, my heart is filled with LOVE, my kiddies hearts are filled with LOVE and my hubby stares at me from a distance with a loving gaze and says, “I love you. The way you get excited about all this is so amazing, so YOU. How lucky our kids are to have you as their mummy.”
And all is well in my world on Valentine’s Day.
If I didn’t do this and my hubby surprised me with a dinner out one year (which I still would love to happen at least once, but there’s zero attachment to it) I would actually miss this little tradition I’ve created.
So, let me ask you a few questions:
If you had to plan your own personal Valentine’s Day,
What would you eat?
What would you do?
What kind of woman would you BE on this day?
What gift would you love to receive?
I invite you to create your own special evening, and if you choose to invite someone to share it with you, that’s YOUR choice.
If I didn’t have a partner and children, or for some reason if I was alone on this day I would:
Buy some Processco and luxury dark chocolates for myself.
Spend a bit of time planning the next “Girls Getaway” with my friends, Sandrine & Laura (this year it’s Italy!)
Watch a movie that my soul desires to watch.
BLISS! Magnifique!
I would FULLY be able to enjoy this day because of the amount of Self-Love I have for myself. I don’t need anyone to “make” me happy, I know how to do that all by myself. And with this energy emanating from me, who knows what I’ll experience or bring into my life?
I’d be curious to hear how you are celebrating (or not) this Valentine’s Day! Are you like me and LOVE the whole theme of love hearts? Or do you prefer to cook a simple dinner for two and watch a movie together? Or, do you go all out, with dinner, hotel and presents?
Please share it in the comments below!
Next week I’ll be sharing yet another way to increase your self-love, so I’ll see you back here soon!
Joyeuse Saint Valentin! xo
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